Should Christians Use Matchmakers?
For many Christian singles, the idea of using a matchmaker brings up mixed feelings. Some wonder if it’s unbiblical. Others worry it means they’re “forcing” something that should happen naturally. And many simply don’t know what modern matchmaking actually looks like.
So let’s talk about it—honestly and without pressure.
What Christian Matchmaking Really Is
At its core, matchmaking is guided connection. It’s not about control, shortcuts, or bypassing God. It’s about discernment, structure, and intentionality.
Historically, matchmaking has always existed in Christian communities—through family introductions, church networks, and trusted leaders who knew people well. Modern Christian matchmaking follows the same principle, just in a more organized and thoughtful way.
It allows singles to:
Be seen beyond a profile
Be introduced with intention
Avoid endless casual dating
Date with clarity, not confusion
Is It Biblical?
Yes, actually. Remember Abraham’s servant? Or Rebekah’s instructions to Jacob? Early in the Bible before the children of Israel were established, “matchmakers” or family friends or servants, would go out on behalf of the family to retrieve a spouse (mostly a wife for a son) for their child. In fact, today, many Jewish people still use matchmakers when it comes to dating. But even if you’re not convinced, Scripture doesn’t command how we meet our spouse—but it does speak clearly about wisdom, counsel, and intention.
Matchmaking aligns with Biblical values when it:
Honors boundaries
Encourages discernment
Avoids manipulation
Leaves room for prayer and choice
A matchmaker doesn’t replace God’s role. They simply help remove unnecessary noise so people can focus on what matters.
Who Matchmaking Is (and Isn’t) For
Matchmaking may be right for you if:
You’re serious about marriage
You’re tired of trial-and-error dating
You want guidance, not pressure
It may not be right if:
You’re looking for something casual
You prefer completely unstructured dating
You’re not ready to be intentional
Intentional dating isn’t desperation. It’s stewardship.
Interested in learning more about faith-based matchmaking or structured singles events? Explore our upcoming opportunities or join our database to stay connected.
